Off The Wagon Again....

Sigh...

So getting back on track hasn't gone so well. In fact, it hasn't really happened at all. I could sit here and make excuses about how things are so busy with school and I've been sick and the baby's been sick, but those would only be empty excuses. The real truth of the matter is that I'm lazy when it comes to certain things. And maybe I'm a bit comfortable with the way things are. After all, I've got an awesome supportive husband, a beautiful daughter, and some of the best friends anybody could ask for. I got into the graduate program that I wanted, I'm actively involved in a couple of groups at church, I'm part of a book club that I really enjoy, and I actually really like my job. Life's not perfect, but it's pretty damn good. Why should I bother to change?

Well, here's why I should bother. The quality of life that I'm living right now is awesome. Life hasn't turned out exactly the way I imagined, but if you ask me if I'd change anything, the answer would be no. My life is happy. However, if I were healthier and in better shape, imagine how much more happiness I could bring to what I've already got. I would be around longer to enjoy the things I've got going for me. And I'd be able to take part in more activities more easily, all just by simply taking better care of myself. I owe it to my family to be around for a long, long time.

So what's the problem? Why can't I get things straightened out with this? I think that the biggest issue is that I just expect to change overnight. I can make the right choices most of the time, but I never really took the time to plan out my day as far as what I will eat and when I will exercise. Without a solid plan, it's so easy to fail. And I never took that into consideration. I have a friend who is excellent at planning things. In fact, I've known her to make a list, an itinerary, for nearly everything. It's her thing, and she's good at it. And I laugh because it cracks me up, but the truth is that I probably need to take a lesson from her on that. If I can just take five minutes to write down a tangible plan every night before I go to bed about what I will have for lunch, a menu for dinner, and what time I will exercise, for how long, and what kind of exercise I will do the next day, I would probably have a better success rate and start seeing more results.

It hasn't all gone to pot though. Out of the fifteen pounds that I'd lost so far, only four have returned. I can still wear my clothes pretty comfortably. And there are a few items that are still too big. But I still have a long way to go. And it has to start with changing a few habits. It's not impossible. I'm not so far off course that I can't still reach the original goals that I set. But it will take more commitment from me, and that will have to start with a more organized plan. And more writing. Writing here helps make me conscious of what's going well and what needs to change. Otherwise, I probably wouldn't think about it so critically. This is a good outlet for my thoughts and I think that will help me with my planning.

I start fresh right now. At 11:44 AM on Monday the 5th of April 2010. Tomorrow I will post a tangible schedule of my day so that I'll have a plan to follow that I can look at and stick to. I'm assigning this to myself as homework :-)